The first question to ask ourselves is: What do I want to achieve? What do I want to change about myself, my life?
For most people it is Happiness.
We cannot change reality, but we can change how we feel, understand and embrace reality.
Self growth is the result of contemplating, out of deep understanding, and making the changes.
Changes are very difficult to achieve using only will power… understanding, and becoming aware of the source of the problem, will provide the needed direction and motivation, to start the process of changing… and growing,
Procedures for Self Growth
- Look around you and watch how people behave in various circumstances. Watch the people you meet at home, work, at the supermarket, on the bus, train and on the street. You may also watch and learn from people being interviewed on TV.
- Watch how people talk, walk and react, and how they are treated by others.
- Pay attention to the way people use their voice and how they react to other people’s voices. Watch how you feel and how you react when people shout, or speak softly. Watch what happens when people get angry, restless and upset, and what happens to you and others, when they are calm and relaxed.
- If you do not like what you see, analyze why you do not like it, and then analyze your own behavior to find out, whether you behave in the same way. Be honest and impartial in your analysis.
- When you discover that you possess some of these undesirable traits of character and behavior, assert to yourself often that every time you catch yourself indulging in these traits or behavior, you are going to be aware of them, and do your best to avoid them.
- Play in your mind a mental scene of how you would like to behave. Repeat it several times a day, every day.
- When you detect in someone a sort of behavior or character traits you like and desire to possess, try to act in a similar way. Here too, visualize several times each day a scene, where you act and behave in that different way.
- Think and visualize over and again in your mind how you would like to act and behave. Constantly, remind yourself of the changes you desire to make, and strive to act according to them. Every time that you find yourself acting according to your old habit, remember your decision to change and improve, and act accordingly.
- Do not be disappointed or frustrated if you do not attain fast results. It does not matter how many times you fail or forget to behave as you desired. Persevere with your efforts and never give up, and you will begin to see how you and your life change.